I may be mercifully free of children, but that hasn't stopped them having a creeping influence on my territory. Stealthily, the 'opinions' of children are increasingly influencing car design. And the new Meriva is a high watermark for this trend. 

One of the reasons the Renault Scenic was such a smash hit when it was launched over a decade ago, was that back bench, hyper-territorial children each got their own seat. And the occupants of the third row of seats in a new Discovery get their ownlidded cubbyhole and stereo controls. Both are understandable inclusions to try and keep the peace when the whole family is onboard.

But when Nissan was designing the UK-built Note MPV it carried out some of its 'customer' research in the primary schools of Milton Keynes. And what did the celebrity-addled little dears want? Tinted rear windows, just like they have on the telly.

But it's the new Meriva that really takes the turkey twizzler.