It was only meant as a jokey aside, but after Mercedes-Benz boss Dieter Zetsche had explained the company’s new naming strategy, he said: "There is going to be a quiz later; pass it and the drinks are on us for the rest of the evening."
Conventional car classes have fractured, split and now lie shattered in niches and sub-niches all over the floor, and despite all its efforts to make sense of all the myriad cars and car types that result, Mercedes will still this year launch a car called a Mercedes-AMG GLE63 S-model Coupé.
So let’s have a little trot through that.
Mercedes means Mercedes, but this is a Mercedes-AMG rather than a Mercedes-Benz because it belongs to the AMG performance sub-brand.
The ‘GL’ in GLE means it’s from the SUV family, the ‘E’ that it’s the mid-sized, E-class-based version, rather than the smaller GLC or larger GLS.
The '63' refers to the engine, because the engine before the 5.5-litre twin-turbo motor used in this car was meant to be a 6.3, although it was actually a 6.2-litre V8, and as this is an ‘S-model’, that will mean it has the most highly tuned version of the engine.
And finally it’s called a Coupé because we’re meant to think it’s a coupé, despite it quite clearly being a very large, high, five-door off-roader.
This is not a Mercedes problem, but an increasingly industry-wide issue, at the forefront of which you’ll find all the large premium German manufacturers.
Zetsche said the name restructuring came as a result of "running out of letters in the alphabet", and I can quite believe him.
But I also believe what a survey recently suggested, which is that the customer is getting increasingly confused by the increasingly baffling array of choices out there and is becoming less rather than more inclined to buy as a result.
As an example of a principle being extended farther than it cares to go, in this industry you’ll find none better.
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The fact that Mercedes is having to explain its strategy (and that the numbers don't relate to cubic capacity, power output, or indeed anything else) says it all.
A sound principle ineffectively implemented
Flawed from the outset
Obviously they have realised that they are lacking in the premium faux-SUV market, so the GLK, M-Class range and GL are all renamed GLC, GLE and GLS - presumably to precede a new push to get on terms with Range Rover, BMW, Audi and Porsche. Theoretically the G-Class should be renamed as well, but there's no way to accommodate a vehicle so outside the rest of the family.
The SLK change makes some sense, but aligning it with the C-Class (SLC) suggests the next one will be quite a bit bigger and heavier. Logically the SL should be renamed SLS, but that would be too confusing as they just ended production on a completely different car with that name, and the SL badge has too much heritage to change.
The CLS has been left unchanged, when really it should be renamed CLE as it's based on the E-Class. Either the next model will be pushed seriously upmarket as an S-Class variant, or it will remain an anomaly.
If they introduce a '4-door coupe' based on the C-Class to compete with the Audi A5 Sportback and BMW 4 Series Gran Coupe (which is surely inevitable), will that be called CLC or CLE? The plan would suggest CLC, but that would bring awkward comparisons with the awful previous shortened C-Class coupe.
The B-Class is now considered a 'core model' which is somewhat surprising given that it's nothing more than a boxy raised A-Class variant. Surely it should be called a VLA (V-Class being the code for people movers, but based on the A-Class). Will we see a plethora of shortened/lengthened/lowered/raised B-Class variations now?
The new naming policy falls short because they didn't apply their own logic across the board. Surely they are setting themselves up for more future problems when they try to create a new niche model.
@ disco.stu
The fact is that if it is confusing to potential and existing customers it is another hurdle to a successful sale.
In comparison, Audi's system of numbers and letters is simplicity itself to understand.