I do love an infographic. It’s like the Internet for grown ups, or for those who didn’t even bother to get dial-up.

So I was fascinated by the infographic that stolen vehicle recovery specialist Tracker sent out which updated me on the £859,500 worth of vehicles the company's devices recovered in July 2014 alone.

What the little pictures told me is that three arrests had been made, which is jolly good. However 19 of the 44 'stolen recovereds' had actually been nicked with their keys.

That is slightly depressing. We should take rather better care of our keys. Even though it is possible for nearby thieves to log all the digital information in the ether and nick our cars anyway. That would account for the other 25 then.

We do need to go back to basics.

Perhaps the simplest deterrent is to keep a yappy dog in the house? You know, the terriers that jump up at the window and go bonkers when all you want to is park nearby.

I think we need a return to great big lumps of metal bolted to steering wheels, or maybe just exterior wheels. At the very least we need an ignition cut off. I’ve gone for those on my older motors.

I think that we need something basic and primeval that can at least bamboozle high-tech thievery. Oh yes, and would even flummox the thief who is lucky enough to purloin the keys.

I was chatting to a friend who has Land Rover 90, which has been pretty much rebuilt, and he really should be keeping a close eye on it. Land Rovers – be they classic-era ones or the latest Range Rover kit like the £80k Sport that Tracker recovered in July – are very stealable.

My mate though has knocked off the immobilser and alarm because they both started to play up. So it is currently unprotected. How mad is that?

So Tracker-style devices aside, what old school anti-theft stuff should we be spannering and plumbing in to our motors?