I was going to be positive and uplifting, but the weather has been so foul I’m in a mood. A mood to find out what your worst car is or was.

I’m interested because for a while I sold my soul to the Fleet Street celebrity fact mincer by asking famous people what their worst car was. In return I had to put a plug for their book, TV series etc at the end of the piece. Effectively then I single-handedly invented the celebrity tittle-tattle culture that is now corroding all of our lives and for that I am really sorry.

Actually not everyone was that famous (I interviewed someone called Paul Hendy, apparently a Saturday morning TV presenter), and if they were even slightly well known (Chris Moyles) then they thought it was so far beneath them that they’d rather not bother.

However Sir Ian Botham rang me back from his Aussie commentary box at 3am to tell me that his Datsun 180 SSS had been a bit of a bounder and he may well have terminated it with his bat.

And then there was Uri Geller’s Peugeot 404 (which he bent in half), Andy McNab’s Renault 5 (I think he blew it up) and Tony Robinson’s impressive list of commercial vehicles that made his life even more miserable than Blackadder ever did.